what if i have herpes without having sex what causes it and how i can get rid of it?

hello every body , i have this virus called herpes and it had appeared four years ago without having sex and it appears on my mouth and inside it and my hands ,recently they started to spread on my leg toes…this time it came but didn’t spread as before as i took the medication in the first stage when it came again…and it appears every two or three month…thats the story and please i need help coz i cant enjoy anything in my life ….and please i need somebody to answer those questions…
-i want to know what causes herpes and how it was transmitted to me without having sex?
-i want to know what to do inorder not to transmitted to anybody else??
-how i can get rid of it or how i can know before i have the virus to cure it before spreading? i need answers because this is so painful :((

PLEASE HELP :((